


Want is a peculiar thing.

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Demisexuality, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-20
Updated: 2014-11-20
Packaged: 2018-02-26 08:21:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2644850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is demisexual, Draco is insecure, Snape is just trying to survive the both of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Want is a peculiar thing.

Draco makes pancakes on Saturday mornings. On weekdays they usually don’t have time to eat together, Severus up before the sun rises to work on his brewing, Harry off soon after to work at that ridiculous pre-school. It bothers Draco to wake up alone most days, but he doesn’t complain. Just… makes the most of the time they do have together.

Their relationship has not been easy, the war has left them damaged men, just trying to survive- and even if not… the wizarding world might understand two men living together, but three? and especially two ex-death eaters with the boy-who-lived-to-save-them-all. Draco is careful to never use terms like that around Harry, still remembers the beginning, the months that Harry didn’t leave the house, the nights he couldn’t stand to be touched, the days he spent a ghost in his own home. 

They didn’t mean to come together like this. Draco had been 19 when the war ended, still full of fight and life, had deflected early enough, had publicly been vital enough that for the most part- the press left him alone. Severus hadn’t been so lucky. Draco had fought for his reputation and then, fought for him. It hadn’t been till Harry had made an official statement for the Quibbler and the Prophet- that they’d been truly accepted.

Severus had invited him to join them for dinner, Draco had been offended when they’d been turned down. There was a second and then a third offer, each time a politely worded dismissal. In return, Draco had almost done something to ruin the entire reason for celebration- by breaking into Grimmauld to get an answer to why.

Had immediately firecalled Severus, who had promptly apparated into the foyer. Harry had resisted at first, but the boy-who-won had become the boy-who-needed-to-be-saved and Severus insisted that it was his job to see the job through. They’d spent the first two weeks in St. Mungos, watching mediwixen heal the physical wounds that Harry had allowed to fester in the months after the war, had taken him home with them to help heal the rest.

He’d lived with them for two years after that before trying to leave, Draco had come home from cursebreaking to find Harry’s stuff packed. There’d been a screaming match, Severus had put them both in a body bind and given them a lecture that would have put Neville in tears. When he’d released them, Harry had screamed again.

Severus listened as he spelled Harry’s stuff back to it’s proper places. Listened as Harry argued that he wasn’t a part of them, never could be. Had screamed that he wanted to be, wanted to be so badly, but knew he could never give them the rest, that he doesn’t want them like they want each other but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want them. That it hurts to be here and not be a part. Severus had paused, eyeing the young man quietly before sending Harry’s clothes to their bedroom instead of his own.

"Whatever you can give us. Whatever that might be. Is enough."

Draco makes pancakes on Saturdays, Severus, when it hasn’t been a bad week, usually makes dinner. When they kiss, it is still full of that fiery passion, Severus can still taste Draco’s fear, still tries to quieten it. When they kiss, Harry usually makes his leave to shower or make lesson plans. There are still nights they have to track him down, have to pull him back into bed when they are through, times when if they didn’t remind him that he is a part of this- he’d probably drift out the door and never return.

Severus isn’t worried, but knows it is one of Draco’s biggest fears. There isn’t time to put it into words, not time to flesh out ways to remind Draco that touch isn’t the only way to say ‘I love you’, not time to figure out how to tell Harry that touch isn’t the only way to say ‘We want you to stay’ or ‘I want to be here’. 

So he touches Draco enough for the both of them, fetches Harry when he doesn’t come to bed on his own, and makes dinner on Saturday nights.

It’s over a pasta dish that Harry couldn’t possibly remember the name of, that Draco notices something is off. Wants to scream ‘no’, wants to throw a temper tantrum, wants to do something to stop Harry’s eyes from flickering towards the door every time Draco and Severus’s hands casually touch or Draco laughs a little too loud. Something to stop him from worrying his bottom lip in between bites. When Harry takes a sudden breath and shoves his chair back, Draco’s right hand digs into the arm of his own and his left clenches Severus’s tighter than necessary. He doesn’t scream or cry out, Severus had told him early on that if Harry really wanted to leave, that they had to let him go.

Except Harry doesn’t dart for the door, watches them with curious eyes as he moves to their side of the table. Severus quietly pushes the table backwards, doesn’t stop until there’s a thud when it hits the seat Harry has recently vacated, making sure there is enough room for him- as he always has.

Emerald eyes stare at the way pale fingers clench at potion stained ones, and carefully, as if approaching a wounded cat, he lays his own on top. Turns to face Draco fully, still worrying his bottom lip as he leans in to kiss his old rival.

Draco’s left hand leaves the arm of his chair to clench at Harry’s neck before softening to stroke gently at his cheek until the tan man pulls back.

"Are you sure about this?"

Harry looks between them, at Severus’s carefully neutral expression and the desperation on Draco’s before nodding.

"I want this. I want… all of you. all of you both."

Severus stands, and Draco follows- watching his older partner as he carefully draws Harry’s attention to him, long fingers twisting in black locks as he gives in to the urge to partake in what is finally being offered, what he’d accepted as impossible.

When they finally make it to the bedroom, Draco strips quickly as Severus regards him with an even eye, “Just remember… if you decide this isn’t what you want in the end… there will always be room for you. This is only a bonus… admittedly, one both of us will enjoy more than you agreeing to go to potion conventions.”

Draco grins, moving to help devest Harry of his shirt as well, “much more than attending those.”


End file.
